If we ask you about the most important component of the date, many of you will say ‘chemistry’. However, if we ask you to describe it, many would say something inconclusive and unhelpful; something like ‘the spark’ or ‘the moment when something clicks’. The problem here is that since many of us can’t accurately describe the chemistry, it can become something unachievable, a myth. So, many think that chemistry is either there, or it isn’t.
However, that’s not completely true. One of the most important components of chemistry is sexual tension. You could argue that attraction is more important than chemistry, but you can find the person attractive without feeling that ‘spark’. Chemistry is an emotional engagement that can be fostered with proper pick-up lines if you know how to use them correctly. This is a desire that is thwarted, by obstacles, circumstances, or design. Intrigued?
1. What’s a beautiful girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
Sexual tension is a facet of our personalities that is often denied but still wanted. Do you know how to make somebody want something? Tell the person that he can’t have it. Don’t let it disappear altogether, but keep it just out of reach. It has been proven that if your desire for something is frustrated, you always want it more. The closer you can get to it without actually having it makes the desire grow more
2. I honestly find your lack of nudity disturbing.
Let’s think about roller-coasters for a moment. You want to have a ride even if you’re afraid of it and it’s not because of the loops, turns, and drops, it’s the anxiety build-up at the beginning. It’s the building of your expectation that makes everything else afterward so satisfying.
When people – and guys tend to say it more often – think about the thrill of the chase, they mean the feeling of inevitability that slowly grows and makes the final point so desirable. That’s why you need to know how to use these pick-up lines; if it makes the girl feel like rejecting you, take a step back, tell her that it was a joke and you both will laugh. Then, you can start building the sexual tension again.
3. They say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?
Everything we discussed above is a key to the desirable process of a slow build up and the release. It’s a game that you should play with a girl – you pull her in, then push her away. You start to create tension with dirty pick-up lines and then cut it off with a joke.
4. Can we take a picture together so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
Keep pushing for too long (it doesn’t matter if it is with physical contact or flirting), and you’re going to redline – you will either overwhelm the lady or creep her out. Either way, you fail this date and have to push the reset button instead of having a night of passion with a beautiful girl. You want to have a takeaway in order to keep everything off balance and pull the tension back if you can.
5. Your lips look so beautiful. Would they like to meet mine?
Takeaways can also help you by creating a vacuum. The girl will notice the absence of tension and will want to fill it. Press on and pull back. The feeling that you’ve almost got something and the uncertainty of it all, can build the overall sexual tension and desire towards resolution.
6. Hey, was it you who invited all these people? Because I thought it was going to be only you and me!
Eye contact is one of the most important parts of creating the tension – and it can be very intimate when followed by dirty pick up lines. Eyes are the most expressive part of our body, and still many underestimate the value of eye contact in flirting.
The eyes can help you and lend a sexual subtext if you’re too afraid to say anything For example, do you remember that the triangle gaze is a way of telling whether a woman or a man is interested in kissing you? So, you can use it yourself after the pick-up line to inspire dirty thoughts. Look to her lips, then from one eye to the other, and then back to her lips because it is always a powerful move.
7. Hey, I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together.
Imagine an angry-looking, big guy walking up to you, stares for some time and says, “Are you trying to hit on me?” Would you be able you respond intelligently and calmly? Most men wouldn’t. Or let’s imagine a beautiful, gorgeous woman in a bright, tight dress walking right up to you, stops and says in a very sexy voice, “Do you want me?” Would you be able not to miss a beat, stay in control, and go with her to the bedroom? Most men would drop the ball and fumble over their words.
What we’re trying to say is that before trying to create sexual tension you should be sure you know how to handle it and that means not flinching if uncommon situations thrust themselves upon you. And there are two key points of this:
- Knowing the correct pick-up line to start
- Having already had the experience
8. I really need a map because I’m getting lost in your eyes.
You won’t get experience sitting at home and waiting, the only way is trying again and again to approach women. That’s field experience and it’s important that you meet a lot of ladies and make a few mistakes. Without the experience, you can’t get the conditioning. And conditioning is a crucial part of your growth. But the first point of the two – experience – you can start working on now, without excessive experience in dating but with pick-up lines that we prepared for you.
9. I was feeling off today, but you definitely turned me on.
This is a response you can use in a tense situation when you feel like running away. Don’t react right away! When most of us panic or get very excited, we often react instinctively and too quickly. However, if you don’t have a lot of experience in dating and using pick-up lines, your instincts will usually be wrong. For example, in a situation when a big, angry guy approaches you, your instincts tell you to sputter out excuses or even worse, to push back and escalate the situation. And your first response to the beautiful lady could be something like, “Absolutely!” or “Did I say I want you?” Neither of these reactions are correct. They will only lead to a bad ending. So don’t instantly react and try to stay calm.
10. Hi, I don’t think we have ever met because I would never forget a pretty face like yours.
You should never escalate a situation. Many people tend to escalate when someone forces something upon them. It is a natural reaction to challenge a guy to fight or to apologize when the situation warrants or some reactions can even make men be rude to the girl they find beautiful. These are wrong reactions because they make you follow the lead of another person, where you should be making them follow your lead.
11. Do you know that you owe me a drink? [Why?] Because I dropped mine when I saw you!
Don’t bow out. Many people bow out of a situation where they feel tension. They tell guys they are sorry and refuse to talk to a beautiful girl because they’re afraid she is toying with him. This is also wrong because these reactions make you look afraid and weak and sometimes ruins a great opportunity.
12. Sorry, but I need directions. [Where?] To your heart.
Always ask direction-changing and clarifying questions. These questions will take the initiative away from another person and give the initiative to you. They will also provide you with time to assess the situation. For example, ask the guy, “Begging your pardon?” then look at him and ask if you know each other. It will steal his thunder and you will regain the initiative. And you can ask the beautiful woman in the red dress “Is this how you usually greet men?” and then tell her she has good taste, but you want to get to know each other better before taking the next step. It will also help you to bring her real intentions to light, just in case you think she is toying with you.
13. Are you busy tonight at 4 AM?
Now, when you know which direction things are going, you can figure out whether the girl is sexually wound up or you can intelligently talk to the angry guy and take it from there. Now it’s time to think what you’re going to talk about after you’ve used the pick-up line.
14. I tried my best to not feel anything for you. And you know what? I failed.
When you want to create sexual tension, you should learn about topics you need to avoid. Opinions, for example, aren’t sexy. And she doesn’t care what you’ve had for lunch or what’s your favorite position or your thoughts about breast implants. These are not the topics that will make a woman lust for you.
Sitting quietly but intensely, on the other hand, or leading her firmly through the club, are all things that can create or increase sexual tension. Use your talking qualities (where you should do the talking, rather than her expressing her opinions and you’re providing feedback so that she is thinking and listening) in situations when you want to increase sexual tension.
15. You look so cold. What about using me as a blanket?
Touching is very diverse when it comes to dating: you can use different techniques to increase sexual tension, or you can just ruin the situation and refrain from touching altogether. If you’re hardly touching her, for example, but strategically touch her from time to time, like tap her stomach while talking or cup her elbow, at some point, you will find a situation where you can put your hand on her back as you guide her through a transition. These can be very exciting moments for both of you. Infrequent touches raise tension slowly and make girls excited as anticipation builds.
16. I bet you are a cool soccer player because you’re a keeper.
Nervous tension is quite hard to work with, especially if you don’t have a lot of experience. But it works perfectly with inexperienced women, or with ladies who are trying to be in control (like those who decide that they will only allow themselves serious relationships even if they have a desire to hook up with you). This is where you don’t touch the lady, but increase sexual tension with pick-up lines and other techniques discussed above. You have to become a master at building sexual tension before trying to deal with nervous tension, or you’ll end up with nothing.
17. Are you a camera? Because I smile every time I look at you.
This can feel a little strange at the beginning, especially if sex is to become the elusive thing men want and women don’t. Suddenly everything has changed and women want you… And you’re still standing and talking about how hard it is to build sexual tension.
You are a changed man now and the way women react to your pick-up line has changed and the ease of having different experiences that you like has changed. At the moment, the only difference between those guys complaining about women and you is that you have turned yourself into a specialist who can open many doors. While others are still wondering why the door is closed in the first place.