You know, if someone told you in 8th grade that science was going to help you get laid some day, I bet you you would have paid a heck of a lot more attention in class. Well, the bad news is that it’s still highly unlikely that we’re going to start teaching our kids social and attraction skills at a school level any time soon. But the good news is that science actually does have some answers as far as male-female attraction dynamics go.
Following are 8 traits, both physical and behavioral, that actual scientific research has found that women find attractive in men. These are not mere assumptions or opinions, but actual conclusions that behavioral scientists have come to following extensive research. And what’s even better, they’re actually traits that you can actively work on cultivating and improving.
Fact 1: Height matters
A 2014 research conducted by professors at Rice University and the University of Northern Texas found out that out of around 1000 Yahoo! Personal Dating ads, nearly 50% of women claimed that they’d prefer to date a man who’s taller than they were. But how did the stereotype of TALL, dark and handsome come about? Well, social psychologists claim that most women are psychologically geared towards finding taller men attractive because most of our world’s cultures regard tall men as embodiments of all that is masculine.
But some scientists believe that the reasons for this go even deeper. A group of researchers from the University of Utah published a study which puts forth the idea that a woman’s preference for taller men actually dates back to our caveman days. In a time and age where physical protection of her and her potential offspring were integral to a woman, she would have been evolutionary geared to gravitate towards taller men who had a clear physical advantage in a confrontation. And although this advantage might seem a little less important in a modern day context, the researchers still believe that this evolutionary programming to find taller men more attractive is still deeply embedded in the female psyche.
But what if you aren’t the most vertically blessed man out there? Do not despair. A group of Dutch researchers have found that at the end of the day what really matters is that you are taller than your intended object of affection.
In addition, remember that it also helps a great deal to develop good posture regardless of your height. Not only will standing straight with your shoulders back make you seem much taller, but it will also help you appear more confidant and dominant.
Fact 2: A bit of stubble helps
There’s a reason why actors like George Clooney, Brat Pitt and Hugh Jackman rock the two-days-without-a-shave look. They understand that women dig a bit of stubble. It’s one of the bad-boy trademarks that women have a soft (and wet) spot for.
In fact, a group of Australian researchers from The University of New South Wales conducted a survey with over 350 women on their preferences for male facial hair, and the overwhelming majority agreed that a bit of stubble was the way to go. Experts in human evolutionarily psychology even claim that from an evolutionary standpoint, men with a bit of stubble would have been considered more dominant, masculine, aggressive and socially mature.
Fact 3: A deep voice is more attractive
Ask any woman who she would rather hookup with, David Beckham or John Hamm (based on their voices alone) and the chances are that she’ll pick the Don. But why is it that women in general seem to find men with deeper, huskier voices more attractive? Well, according to a bunch of researchers from University College London, it’s because women perceive a deeper voice as a sign of a larger and stronger physicality; something that women are evolutionarily geared to find attractive.
But what if your voice isn’t honey-in-your-ears huskey like, say, Javier Bardem? Well as a singer I can tell you that the voice is an incredibly versatile instrument that can be tailored quite a bit. So if you’re not happy with the squeak that you’re producing when you talk to women, sign up for a few voice training or speaking lessons, and you’ll be surprised with how much versatility you’ll find in your voice.
Fact 4: An athletic body
Now before you hit the gym and load up on protein supplements, read ahead. Researchers have found that out of all the body shapes, women in general seem to prefer a “V-shaped” athletic body on a man; that is to say a strong and well-defined musculature on the upper body and a narrow and slim waist. So if you’re lacking in this department, it might be time to get yourself an advantage with a good exercise and diet plan.
Wearing clothes that fit perfectly is another good idea. A well-tailored blazer will often give the impression of broad shoulders while V-neck t-shirts can help make your torso look slimmer.
Fact 5: Slower movements
Look at any archetypical alpha male character from a movie and the first thing that you’ll notice is that they seem to do everything extra slow. Take any Clint Eastwood character for instance. He hardly says more than a few dozen words in a movie but he still looks like the coolest fucking guy ever. In fact, researchers have found that men who have slower movements and speech are often perceived as more at ease and confident, and thus, more attractive. So start paying attention to the speed at which you operate in day-to-day life. Slowing yourself down might feel unnatural at first, but with practice it will become second nature.
Fact 6: A sense of humor is a huge asset
You know the cliché is true; you really can laugh your way into a girl’s pants. But don’t just take our word for it. Go on any dating site and take a look at ten profiles, and I’ll guarantee you that at least 8 of them will list a good sense of humor as an important trait in a potential partner. But why do funny guys get the girl? Well researchers from Northumbria University claim that humans perceive a good sense of humor as a sign of both intellect and social intelligence. And according to Kristofor McCarty, the head of the research project, women are evolutionarily geared to respond to signs of intelligence and social intelligence as an attraction factor. The logic behind this being that an intelligent man would be better able to provide for and protect a woman and her potential offspring.
But what if you’re not that funny? Well here’s the good news, developing a sense of humor in a lot of ways is like learning a new instrument. You can definitely learn and you’ll only get better with practice. So to start off pick a few movie or television characters that you think are funny and start paying attention to what it is exactly that makes them funny. And if you’re willing to go the full yard, maybe even sign up for an amateur comedy class. You’ll be surprised at the results some wit and humor will get you with women.
Fact 7: Social value is extremly powerful
Let’s face it; women don’t really want to be with the guy who sits around his apartment playing Xbox all day. Women want to be with men who are the life of the party wherever they go. They want to be with men who always seem to have a flock of both men and women crowding around them, trying to be a part of his exciting life. This is social value.
Here’s an example. In a research carried out in 2010, a group of researchers from Duke University asked a group of heterosexual volunteers to rate the attractiveness of men and women who were photographed by themselves. The researchers then showed a second group of volunteers pictures of the same men and women, but this time paired with a person of the opposite sex whom the volunteers told were their exes. Their findings? The men and women who were photographed next to a “hot” ex were almost always rated as more attractive by the volunteers from the second group, even if they weren’t rated as highly by volunteers from the first group. You can read more about this effect here.
So how do you go about creating this “social value” and pre-selection? Well you can start off small. Instead of focusing on going out alone and trying to pickup attractive women, instead start off by going out with the aim of meeting new and interesting people. Cultivate friendships with people who add value to your life and add value to your social presence. Make and effort and soon enough you’ll be the guy that everyone at the party knows and gets to skip the line at any club. You’ll be the guy with “social value.”
Fact 8: Leadership skills are attractive also in your social life
Imagine yourself living in the days of our cavemen ancestors, when we used to hunt woolly mammoths for dinner and fight off saber tooth tigers every other Sunday. In such an environment a cavewoman’s best chance at survival and raising a healthy bunch of cavebabies would have been to get with the caveman that led the group.
And according to behavioral psychologists this evolutionarily programming is still very much in effect in women today. In a study carried out in 2014, researchers found that people who are a part of a specific group were much more likely to find the group’s leader attractive than people who weren’t in the group. For example, employees at a particular firm were found to be more likely to find the firm’s CEO attractive than people outside the firm would.
So how do you go about cultivating this trait? You can start small. Leadership is in many ways an art that takes time to develop. Put yourself in situations where you’re forced to take the reins. It could be something as simple as taking control of your group of friends or it could be something as ambitious as founding your own startup company. Once women see that you are able to effortlessly and elegantly take control of and inspire a group of people into action, they’ll find you a hundred times more attractive.
So there you have it. 8 scientifically proven traits that women find attractive in men. And remember, as always knowledge is only useful as long as it’s applied. So I hope that you work on developing and honing these 8 traits in your own personality and that you enjoy a significant increase in your successes with women.