How To Explore Shibari While Single

By Patrick Banks

Posted 9 months agoSEX

Sure, you may be using your time while being single to learn a new hobby, like making banana bread, making a habit of hitting the local gym more frequently, or solving sudoku puzzles. Yep, those can be an excellent addition to everyone’s life. 

However, if you consider yourself a sexually spirited and liberated person, why not explore tying your next partner up with some intricate Japanese bondage? Regardless of whether you’ve always been that person into playing with restraints or you’re just starting to learn the ropes, exploring how to practice Shibari can certainly tie up all your lusty loose ends.    

Okay… But What Exactly Is Shibari? 

Through the years, BDSM which covers bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, and sadomasochism—has become very popular among people liberated from sexual mores. In that context, one of the most popular forms of bondage is Shibari, also commonly known as Japanese rope bondage.        

Shibari, which translates to “to tie,” is a Japanese type of BDSM or kink play that includes tying your partner (or vice versa) with a rope. As a matter of fact, this highly-arousing play has originated as an underground form of culturally specific erotic fantasy play which centers on erotic nostalgia of bygone eras. In the same manner that kinky people of European heritage have integrated tools and legends of medieval European incarceration into their sex plays, Japanese enthusiasts found carnal inspiration from historical fables of their incarcerated heroes and captured maidens.

Over the past two decades, Shibari has become increasingly popular outside of its country of origin as today it’s enjoyed by consenting adults worldwide. So, are you ready to spice up your sex life and explore Shibari? If your answer is positive, you’re all set to continue reading this article and enlighten your need to tie or be tied. 

How To Do Shibari Like A Pro

Now that you have a better understanding of the origin and basics of Shibari, it’s time to learn how to do it like a pro! Just like with anything else in life, when it comes to Shibari—practice makes perfect, so don’t be discouraged if it takes a couple of tries to get it right.

You Can’t Do It On Your Own; Find A Partner! 

First things first, in order to explore Shibari, you need to find a partner who trusts you and is willing to be tied. With Shibari, this is essential because the technique requires a lot of trust between the partners. In addition, it would be perfect if your partner is patient and easy to communicate with because Shibari involves a lot of communication throughout the process.

When you’re single, finding the right partner to enjoy a night of Shibari can be a rather challenging task. However, that certainly doesn’t mean you should give up, as there are probably many like-minded people who are into bondage play and Shibari in your local area. For example, you can try finding a match on some popular dating app or contact a professional male escort service to meet new people willing to explore this Japanese kinky play.          

Find A Place And Choose Your Rope

After you find the right partner, you should also find the place where you’ll practice the technique, as it requires enough space to move around and a mat or something similar to protect you and your partner’s knees.

Next, remember that the type of rope you choose is essential, as different ropes come with varying friction levels and might be more or less comfortable. The most frequently used rope for Shibari is hemp rope, but you can also opt for synthetic rope, such as polyester or nylon. Likewise, you’ll need to select the right rope size depending on your bodies’ width to get the maximum pleasure.

If it’s your first time, we recommend using a six-millimeter jute rope, as you’ll most probably need ten to fifteen feet of rope for each person participating in the bondage. 

The Shibari Process

Start the process by tying a basic knot and tying one end of the rope to the anchor point. Then, take the other end of the rope and use it to secure your Shibari partner to the anchor point, as this will be the foundation of all the knots you’ll tie during the process.

Afterward, tie a chest harness. This tie should go around your partner’s chest and help support their shoulders and back. Then, add a leg harness. This tie should go around your partner’s legs and help them stay in the desired position. At last, tie a know around your partner’s wrists to help them stay in place and ensure they won’t slip out of the rope.

Experiment And Explore

Once you learn the Shibari basics, only the sky’s the limit for you and your partner! In that regard, you can experiment with different rope knots and lengths or even incorporate other erotic elements like handcuffs or chains. With Shibari, the possibilities for bondage play are endless!       

Why Explore Shibari? 

If you’ve ever experimented with handcuffs and loved to get pinned down, you already know the thrill of playing with restraints and power dynamics. The thing with Shibari is that it can offer a sense of relinquishing and building trust with a partner artistically and intimately. 

Nevertheless, it’s worth noting that Shibari isn’t strictly sexual, as tying someone up or getting tied up can also build an intimate connection between partners by learning about each other’s bodies and discovering a whole new level of exciting intimacy.

Rope bondage is a fantastic way to add that extra level of excitement to your sex life, and it can be as complex or as simple as you want it to be. As there are endless possibilities in Shibari, don’t be afraid to experiment and learn new things about yourself and your body. 

The most important thing is to take all precautionary measures for the play to be safe and, of course, consensual. In the end, have fun because that’s what this Japanese bondage play is all about. Remember: there are no strict rules! The only limit is your imagination and naughtiness.    

About the author Patrick Banks

Patrick is a Berlin-based dating advisor, motivational speaker, a huge fitness and vegan diet enthusiast and the main editor at Wingman Magazine, specialised in men's health. His ultimate goal is to share with men around the world his passion for self-development and to help them to become the greatest version of themselves. He believes a healthy body and successful social interactions are two main keys to happiness.

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