You know what’s best? Whatever happens in your dreams will be registered in your mind as an authentic experience.
Experiencing sex dreams is one of the healthy ways to fulfil your sexual needs. It’s been scientifically proven that orgasms in lucid dreams can be real orgasms for both men and women. Orgasm is lucid dreams can be accompanied by real physical responses such as muscular reactions, an increased heart rate, and changes in vascular tissue.
What’s more, if you train your mind properly, you can invite whoever you want into your bedroom while dreaming. Why not have sex with a Victoria Secret Angel or fulfil even your naughtiest fantasies?
Sleeping habits that facilitate sex dreams
▪ Create a Sensual Sleeping Environment
What would make your mind more likely to produce sex dreams: baggy flannel pyjamas and an old blanket, or a sensual touch of silk sheet on your naked skin? My bet is on the second option! Your bedclothes and choice of sleepwear won’t guarantee you a sex dream, but they can help create feelings of freedom and send your sleeping mind in a more sexual direction.
▪ Pick the Right Position
A study published in the journal Dreaming says you can increase your likelihood of sex dreams by sleeping in a certain position. Researchers found out that people who sleep on their stomachs with their arms above their heads are more likely to have sex dreams than people who choose other sleeping positions.
▪ Relax a Few Hours Before Bedtime
One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to watch TV or use devices before bed, eat and drink, have arguments, consume alcohol, or do anything else that only excites you and prevents you from relaxing.
The evening is a wind-down period, which means you should focus on slow activities to prepare mentally and physically for the 8 hours of sleep you’re about to get.
A relaxed evening routine ensures you will fall asleep quickly and your dreams will be more vivid.
▪ Disconnect Your Electronics Before sleeping
Switch off your phone, your laptop, and any other electronic devices at least an hour before you fall asleep. Research by scientists from the National Sleep Foundation shows that a majority of Americans watch TV or spend time on their smartphones right before going to bed. The light emitted from screens negatively interrupts our sleep patterns later in the night. Instead of playing with your phone or computer before bed, practice the exercises explained in the next section of this article.
▪Read a Book Before Bed
Reading before bed has been proven to be a remedy for insomnia. In addition, it helps you relax and deal with stress.
But it’s even more than that. It’s actually one of the most natural ways to fall asleep, empty your mind, leave devices behind, and forget about the problems from earlier today.
The content of the book matters too, of course. In order to have great sex dreams, you should choose an erotic novel.
For those with a vivid imagination, even a few pages might be enough before they’re already asleep and having a sensual dream.
There are various sorts of sensual books you could pile next to your bed. Some of them are world famous masterpieces such as kinky classics of Marquis de Sade, the author of the sentence:
“Sexual pleasure is, I agree, a passion to which all others are subordinate but in which, they all unite” or ‘Kama Sutra’ – the ancient Indian text about sensuality would be an even better fit for you?
From more contemporary masters, such as a nonfiction ‘Thy Neighbor’s Wife’ by Gay Talese or ‘City of Sin: London and its Vices’ released in the United States as The Sexual History of London. Maybe erotic stories ‘Indecent Proposals’ by Miranda Forbes or ‘The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory’. Whichever you choose, you can be sure that they will drive your mind towards more sensual directions.
The next step you must take to improve both the quality of your sleep and dreams, is to get out of your pyjamas and sleep naked instead.
Some of the benefits of that include regulated cortisol levels and improved genital health. It helps you lose weight as your body burns more calories to keep you warm and can significantly improve your relationship with your partner as body contact leads to cuddling and sex more often when both of you sleep naked.
In addition, you feel freer and happier You’re more comfortable in your skin and sexy, which allows your brain to also fulfil your sexual needs while you’re sleeping.
▪ Don’t Masturbate for a Few Days
Cutting down your masturbation increases your chances of having a sex dream. If you hold yourself back yourself from masturbating for a few days, your increased need for the release can set the stage for sex in your dreams.
Lucid Dreaming – Learn to control your dreams
Lucid dreaming means being aware that you’re dreaming without waking up. With practice, this awareness can be augmented by the ability to maneuver and manipulate what you’re dreaming about.
There are many methods for training yourself to have lucid dreams: keeping dream journals, taking supplements which boost your acetylcholine, naturally increasing your melatonin levels, mediation, reality checks, etc. You can find more lucid dreaming tips here: How to lucid dream tonight.
Lucid dreams significantly increase the strength of your excitement, love, and orgasms compared to how they feel when we’re awake. It’s no surprise that the number one reason people start practising lucid dreaming is to learn how to have a sex dream!
Visualize your sex partner before falling asleep
Form a clear picture in your mind of the partner you want to have sex with before going to bed. You can even write this down before falling asleep. The more detailed you visualize your partner and the surrounding scenery, the more likely you are to succeed in having a vivid lucid dream.
For best results, visualize a partner you have already had sex with. This will work more powerfully on your subconscious since you can draw on your memories from real life. Relax, and let your mind remember little details about your lover – such as her scent, her voice, and the touch of her naked skin. As soon as she appears in your dreams, it will be a clear signal to your mind that you’re dreaming, which will enable you to start controlling the situation.
Set a proper dream location
The dream location itself is not important. You can teleport yourself anywhere, whether it’s a fantasy land or a real place.
Do you want to have sex while exploring the galaxy? Why not!
It’s important, however, to set the dream location firmly in your mind before you start having sex with your dream partner. Give yourself some time to explore the location before looking for a partner in your dream.
Sometimes, putting a person you want to make love with into your dream at the very beginning doesn’t work. A more efficient method is to ask her to wait for you somewhere hidden in the dreamscape.
You can, for example, visualize a door opening to reveal your dream-partner waiting for you. Don’t rush. Make sure that before a new person enters your dream, you feel comfortable with the setting and the fact that you’re dreaming.
Don’t focus on foreplay
As opposed to real life, don’t focus too much on foreplay. In such an exciting circumstance, it’s very easy to lose control and wake up.
Even experienced practitioners usually maintain only 6-10 minutes of lucid dreaming. Use your limited time as best you can!
For example, see yourself and your partner naked, so you don’t waste precious time undressing.
The moment when you realize you’re dreaming is crucial. Take it slow, so the excitement doesn’t wake you up. Calmly explore your surroundings. You have to stabilize your awareness within the dream before focusing on the fantasy scenario you want to experience.
It’s very important to trust yourself and be sure that you’re the architect of your own dreamscape. Make sure nothing can happen which would hurt you in your dreams. You don’t want to wake up in the middle of sex, do you? Learn to practice basic dream-control skills.
Dream stabilization techniques
A problem many beginners experience is that it’s difficult to hold onto conscious lucidity until the critical moment. A sexual lucid dream is highly arousing, and most people wake up before the experience goes very far. To prevent this, simply apply these techniques when you start losing control of your dream – to prevent your dreamscape from collapsing.
▪ Look at the palms of your hands
Put your hands in front of your head and simply observe every detail of your palms. This practice helps to stabilize your dreams, calm you down, and maintain your dream-state. The more mindful you are in this exercise, the clearer your dreams will be.
▪ Try dream anchoring
This visualization technique anchors you in a dream. Feel yourself as a part of the dream, and hold onto this feeling. Anchor yourself to the dream.
Combine this technique with looking at the palms your hands, and even give yourself verbal commands, such as: “Stabilize Lucidity”, and “Focus on Now”.
▪ Hold onto something
If you start losing control of your dream, try to grab onto something. This could be your T-shirt, a blanket, your bed frame, or a tree. The physical sensation of seeing and touching an object can prevent you from waking up. Also, take some time to examine the object you’re holding. Combine this technique with other methods, such as verbal commands like “stabilize lucidity”.
▪ Attempt dream spinning
Dream Spinning should be used if the other methods don’t work. This is useful if your dream starts fading out of your control and you can’t examine your hands. For example, you may find yourself in a place of infinite darkness. Try to spin yourself slowly in your dream, as if you were figure skating. However, this spin has to be short and controlled to avoid transporting you into a new dreamscape or waking you up.
To become the architect of your dreams, try to control your thoughts in real life. How often are you awake but not really present? Many modern humans have lost the ability to be fully present. For example, they dream about holidays when they’re at work. However, when they’re on vacation, they think about what they have to do at work when they return from their trip.
Overcome your tendency to be distracted by meditating and practising mindfulness. Be right here, right now – and intentionally create your own thoughts. The ability to be fully awakened during the day is an essential part of raising your consciousness in your dreams.