So you survived the first date and you want to come back for more. It’s totally fine if you want to play it safe by going for a dinner and/or movie. But if you want to kick things up a notch and make a better impression than your first one, it might be time for you to think out of the box. Yes, that’s right. You need to make an effort because the bar is set a bit higher now for the second date.
You talked, she laughed, you shared smiles and tidbits of information. Things went so smoothly. There were no awkward moments. And she’s now a little bit more certain that you aren’t a serial killer. So, how do you top that? Honestly, it’s not going to be easy. Because the second date is right about the time she’s going to check how well you’d fit with her. That’s right. This is the time when she’ll want to see a bit of the real you.
None of that generic surface stuff. The “first-date” you were great. No doubt about it. She said yes, after all. But the second date is where you need to have more fun, more interaction, and more conversation. And, not to add too much pressure, but according to the Singles in America survey, 70 percent of single women are more excited about the second date than they are with the first date. Uh-oh. Which is why you’ll need to do make sure that your second date meets the following criteria:
- It should be an activity – it gives her a better glimpse of your personality and interests. It also will ensure you have fun. And according to psychologists, enthusiasm is contagious.
- It should be light – not something that’ll scare her off because you’re already showing signals of commitment. This means no to meeting your friends or parents or to having dinner at your place. Because that is just creepy. She might not think you’re a serial killer but she’s not 100% positive, is she?
- It should be inclusive – something you can do with another person and she wouldn’t need much experience with the activity (so that’s a no to rock wall climbing, horseback riding, or basketball).
- It should allow for conversations to occur – because this is a getting-to-know-you-even-better date, you’ll need to have enough time to talk. Yes, talk. Because talking will show her how interesting you are. And, you might even find out how much more interesting she can be.
- It should not be at your regular spot – you want to be able to focus on her, not on all the people who’ll be greeting you and wanting to chat. Plus, there’s the added horror of making her think you drink too much or you run into someone you previously dated.
Now that you know what the parameters are for a good second date, let’s start tossing out ideas. After all, we wouldn’t want you to hurt your brain too much just thinking of possible activities. We’ll save that for the date itself.
1. Go on a bike ride
Most people today know how to ride a bike. She may even own one. So that’s already one ticked off the checklist. Taking a bike ride to explore parts of the city or the countryside (depending on where you’re located) is an activity that puts no pressure on the two of you. Check!
You’ll have lots of interesting things to see like a new neighbourhood in your city or the breathtaking view which leads to interesting conversations. Check!
Since it’s not something that people regularly do on a second date, it’ll be a great way to make yourself unique in her eyes. And if things don’t work out between the two of you at the end of the date, at least you had fun.
2. Go wine tasting
What woman doesn’t love wine, right? But how does this differ from going out for drinks? The key difference is that you’re going to be doing an activity together – trying out different wines – which can stimulate conversation between the two of you. And you won’t look like you’re trying to get her drunk. As an added bonus, you can use the time to share something intimate about yourself.
Psychologists believe that showing vulnerability will make your date feel safe to do the same. And this can lead to forming a deeper connection. That element of trust can help you zip all the way through to a third date.
3. Go to a board game cafe
Cafes aren’t for just for coffee lovers. Often, the cafe also serves different kinds of teas and desserts which bodes well for you if your date isn’t a coffee person. But instead of just going to an ordinary cafe, why not add a bit of fun with some board games? Not only will it give you that socially inclusive activity for the second date, you’ll also preserve that delicate balance between awkward silence and talking too much.
4. Play mini golf
Everyone knows how to play this game. They might not be good at it but they’ll be able to play it. The great thing about mini golf is that it’s fun to play. It allows you to be equally engaged in the activity and each other. Win or lose, you’re both bound to have a good time.
5. Explore flea markets
Flea markets are troves of treasures great and small. You and your date are bound to find a lot of cool, interesting stuff. Not only will the activity give you a lot of time to talk and things to talk about, it’ll help you show her (and vice versa) the things that you find interesting. And if things go really great, you might end up with great mementoes of your 2nd date.
6. Go for a hike
According to a survey done by dating site EliteSingles, spending time outdoors is one of the hottest hobbies among singles in the US. And based on scientific research, couples who sweat together, stay together. All those endorphins can make you even more attractive in her eyes. So why not take combine a bit of exercise and quiet time alone on your second date, right?
7. Go on a picnic
We already rule inviting her to your place for a home-cooked meal. Serial killer, remember? But what woman wouldn’t love a man with culinary skills. Or at least one who makes an effort in cooking. So, here’s the perfect compromise. Pack a picnic and find a park or a botanical garden where you can wine and dine her and not break the bank too much.
8. Take a class together
There’s something sexy about a man who is adventurous enough to learn a new skill. And before you start googling for local pottery classes, stop. The Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore action in Ghost aren’t likely to happen. You might end up not getting that third date after all. Try a cooking class or be even more daring and go for ballroom dancing.
All women love being swept off their feet. What better way to do it than while doing the tango? And should things not work out between the two of you, you’ve got a new skill to impress future dates. It really never hurts to increase your repertoire.
9. Visit an amusement park
There’s something about carnivals and amusement parks that just bring out the kid in all of us. It is, after all, a timeless tradition. And we all know how women find it attractive when you win prizes for us, even if it’s a stuffed toy we’ll never think of buying ourselves. It goes all the way back to the medieval ages. Tournaments to win your fair maiden’s favour. You get what I mean. Anywho, aside from playing fun games, you can also eat too much greasy food and sweets, and enjoy going on the rides.
10. Lose yourselves in a corn maze
Navigating a maze establishes teamwork while giving you that buzz of excitement and challenge. You can check how well you complement each other in solving problems. You also have enough alone time to talk and get more deeply acquainted. And, fingers crossed, you might enjoy getting lost together in more ways than one.
Because that small bit of fear that getting lost gives you? It’s dopamine and it can make you feel more attracted to the person you’re sharing the experience with. Which means she’ll be feeling the same way. By the time you’ve made it out of the maze, you may have already made out and achieved that third date.