How to Be More Confident in Yourself And Achieve Your Goals

By Patrick Banks

Posted 2 years agoGROWTH

Everyone has the ability to be more confident in themselves and shine. With just a few simple changes, you can adapt your way of thinking and create a more positive life experience. If you feel that fear keeps you from getting what you want out of life, then this article is for you.
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Growing up is tough. Not all of us had perfect circumstances to evolve, sometimes our wings were cut off somewhere on the way. Finishing school and embarking on life as an adult means making big decisions, taking on major responsibilities, and, when it comes down to it, working out who you are as a person. How to be more confident in yourself if society made us so hard already? 

Worst of all, all the while everyone around you seems to have it all figured out. If you’re struggling with shyness it can seem like everyone else is calm, collected, and in control.

Truth is, pretty much everyone suffers from insecurity, shyness, or social anxiety at least some of the time. A lot of people feel like this a fair amount of the time. The good news is there are tips and tricks you can use to appear (and most importantly, feel) more confident.

How to be more confident in yourself?

The biggest enemy of confidence and enjoying life, in general, is fear. When untamed it has the power to change the way we perceive reality, other people, and most importantly ourselves. Self-confidence comes naturally when you have eliminated fear and anxiety from your thinking.

Easier said than done… So let’s look closer at what is and focus on understanding what stops us from becoming a more confident person.

1. How to Overcome the Irrational Fear

The first step to overcoming your fear is to understand what you are afraid of. Whether it is loss of life or loss of face, fear is often associated with loss.

Once you know that what you feel is fear, you can begin the process of identifying that fear. Spend time calmly and mindfully analyzing the events you felt anxious about, paying attention to how your body feels when you think about them.

We have to divide and conquer stress, which gives us the motivation to overcome our irrational fears. Think of how many times you have experienced anxiety before a meeting or while speaking to a large group of people? What did that fear help you to accomplish?

It probably only caused you stress and affected your performance negatively—imagine how you would have performed if you were relaxed and confident.

Treat self-confidence like any other emotion – for example, happiness. Sometimes happiness comes naturally, but sometimes it can be a struggle. If you are wondering how to be more confident in yourself, start by changing your attitude and reinforcing positive emotions can help you promote self-confidence from within.

And on the other side, there is anxiety, which comes alongside fear, it should be avoided by all means. One of the symptoms of anxiety is the tendency to over-think things to an extent that you compound your fears and actually make them worse. Being mindful also means recognizing those things that you are not in control of and accepting them. 

Instead of trying to control your environment, it is important to remember that controlling your reactions to what happens around you is often more effective than trying to manipulate all of the variables around you.

In 99% of situations, fear does nothing but constrain us. Evolutionarily speaking, fear has been important for our survival and has served to protect us, warning us of potential dangers in our environment. However, this self-preserving, instinctual emotion can also be an obstacle to achieving what you desire.

2. Create a Positive self-image

Self-confidence comes from self-acceptance and feeling good about yourself. Nobody is perfect but sometimes it is about coming to terms with and accepting your defects. Don’t be so critical of yourself, becoming a better person through self-improvement and through learning additional skills will go a long way in promoting a positive self-image from within that others will notice.

Negativity is part of what turns fear into a self-harming attitude. Instead of letting irrational fears turn your perspective into a defeatist attitude, you should turn these feelings around and use them positively.

Try this small activity every day: On your way to the bus stop, think of one positive self-affirmation. Self-affirmations can come from a number of personal qualities or skills; the important thing is to be mindful of the positive value you bring to yourself and others.

That said, it never hurts to try and improve your defects though. For example, if you have fluorosis and it’s making you anxious, then you can consider getting high-quality porcelain veneers in Raleighor one near you. If doing so will help boost your confidence, then do it.

Every day think of something you are good at. For example, reading this article means you are interested in self-improvement, so that is definitely something to be proud of for the day.

It’s also important to remember not to be too anxious or needy. Just because your boss passed you this morning without saying hello doesn’t mean that he or she views you negatively or as not worthy of acknowledgment—relax and go about your day with a positive attitude.

If you want to try and regain your confidence so you can start living your best life, consider the suggestions above and whether or not they could help you make a difference.

3. Develop a self-confident attitude

Change your attitude from “What will other people think” to “What I think is what really matters.” Too many people let themselves be controlled by fear or are too worried about what others think of them. Remember you are the one that has to live with yourself—don’t be a people pleaser, not everyone is going to like you nor should they.

If you are the kind of guy that everyone likes and gets along with, what might you be sacrificing—do they really know you? Being a people pleaser can prevent you from being noticed for your own merits and uniqueness. It’s okay to care what some people think of you and your work, but your main focus should be delivering good quality work that your boss will appreciate.

You have to make a decision about who is in control of your life—is it you or others? How to be more confident about yourself knowing your flaws? Everyone has fears and weaknesses. Sometimes when you think people are thinking badly of you, it’s all in your head—the irrational side of your conscience has given into anxiety, into the fear of not being comfortable with yourself.

Being confident in your ideas and stating them clearly and politely will help you gain the respect of your peers and your boss. People respect strong characters that are not afraid of expressing their opinions and ideas.

Remind yourself

  1. Everything is fine
  2. There is no failure, only feedback
  3. Only I decide how what people think about me affects me
  4. Only I choose what I feel at any given moment
  5. Any new people I meet are an opportunity to form valuable relationships
  6. My input is valuable to the company

4. Look self-confident

Appearance is an important consideration when developing your self-confidence. How we dress reflects, in some ways, what we would like to achieve and where we would like to go in life. No matter what your position—whether you are just a trainee or even a manager, the way you dress reflects how you feel about yourself and how others perceive us.

Wear clothes that not only exhibit your style but also your career aspirations. Try not to overdress because you shouldn’t look like you are “trying too hard.” Always exhibit impeccable grooming and dress appropriately for your workplace.

Confidence is partially based on our physiology. Sometimes looking good also makes us feel better about ourselves. Imagine a more confident you and how that might feel when approaching your boss or simply walking down the street or through the office. Remember to always keep your head high while looking straight in front of you Keep your pace slow and walk confidently. Practice this until it becomes a habit, and don’t forget that your body language and the way you walk affect the way you are perceived by others, so stay poised.

If you are interested in a confident posture, check out these videos:

The Ultimate Guide to Boost Your Confidence Through Dressing Up According to Your Body Type

It is pretty common for women to be obsessed with fashion. Women go overboard and always want to look their best no matter what. Whether it’s a night out with friends, a weekend gateway or even a meeting, women will always want to look good. But, men also want to look good too.

The fashion industry is a literal blow-out, and we mean it. Leading fashion designers and the paparazzi have made a lot of men insecure by swarming pictures of the clichéd ‘tall, dark and handsome’ man on the runway in magazines.

While you owe this slacked image of yours to oodles of catalog subscriptions, it’s time you realize that these aimless expectations aren’t actually doing any justice to your albeit skinny, stout or short figure. Not everybody is muscular like The Rock or is awfully cute and immensely gifted despite being short like Tom Holland. 

You’re you – and it’s time you embraced your body shape with utmost comfort and an immaculate dressing sense that will woo everyone as you go. Mentioned below are two body types that we’ve discussed along with some suggestions that you wouldn’t get on the heavily sponsored runway.

The Tall Type

Ever since the 1900s, the Presidential election of America has been home to around 18 ‘tall’ candidates, which we think might be slightly true if you see The States’ last President. Sarcasm aside, taller men do have an advantage – somewhat biased and sexist – amongst their shorter male allies. 

They have more charisma – thanks to those centimeters – and therefore, get to enjoy versatile job opportunities with good salaries and rapid promotions. According to a few studies, they also live longer, but it is highly necessary for them to be happy at the same time. 

Tall men really have everything working out for them, but does their fashion sense help them too?

The Tall and Thin Type

However, even though you have the body of a president or a superstar, you’re still unable to find your shoe size to fit those clodhoppers of yours, and pointy shoes are a no-no. Andrew Garfield has to thank his stylist for making him appear like a million dollars on the runway – you don’t. 

You’re busy searching the aisles at boutiques for dress shirts with sleeves that hug your wrists just perfectly but since there aren’t any, there’s no way you’re attending that conference in style. Just because you’re over 6 feet tall, you can’t appear too commanding and authoritative too. 

So, what do you do? 

First of all, stop whining – your height is amazing and needs the perfect clothing to be shown off adequately. 

Tailored Fittings

Go for tailored fittings if you can’t find your size in dress-shirts. Uneven sleeves are the worst and you need to avoid that before you head into that office for an interview.

Waistcoats and Double-breasted suits

Add waistcoats, vests and double-breasted suits to your wardrobe. Since you’re skinny yet tall, you need to wear a little bit of padding to support your thin build. 

Layer in Winters

Unless you’re looking like an animated pile of clothing, we’d suggest you to opt for the layered look and pair a leather jacket with a button-down shirt. 

Textures and Patterns

You need to create the perfect illusion to give that sleek figure some depth. Strut those checkered textures and windowpanes on your suits and t-shirts to give your bones something to breathe about.

In addition to the rest, wear thick, leather belts instead of suspenders and make sure they’re placed nicely. Go for coats that are three-quarter length in size and end just above the knee for a bulking feature. Add some robust cord, denim or camel jeans into your wardrobe, and a couple of crew neck tees and sweaters to shake a bit off that surface area from your girth.

The Tall and Heavy Type

You’ve a little meat on your bones enough to pull off a few pounds here and there. While this isn’t fooling anybody, we all know that you’ve been wearing baggy clothes to hide your huge mass.

Well, while you really want your clothes to be simple, lightweight and comfortable, you don’t know how to cause less of an impact with your bulging mass. You also know that finding tailored-fit clothing for your body shape might be really hard and it will only be short of a miracle if you can find one in the boutique. 

So, what do you do?

Well, with some facial hair, a couple of suspenders and an immaculate tailor, we are moments away from changing your impression of yourself as a ‘fat man’ to a ‘heavy yet big man’. 

Wear wide-spread collars

Wear wide-spread neck collars whenever you’re considering wearing suits. Wide spread collars give more space to tie a magnificent necktie knot and therefore, give you more room to breathe.

Take a hat

Spend your money on the latest fedora or a bunch of those vintage hats you saw at the boutique. Hats aren’t just for potbellies. 

Wear over-alls

If you’re catering to your garden or work at a construction site, then consider pairing your body with overalls. They will prevent you from bruising in places that will be otherwise prone to exposure if you just threw a pair of slacks and a washed-up t-shirt. 

Avoid tucking in your shirt

Think twice before you tuck in your button-down shirt inside your trousers. Wear lightweight trousers and leave the shirt un-tucked for a casual, single plane look. You can also wear polo shirts as they can also help in diverting the attention away from your mid-waist. 

The Short Type

We really don’t want you to hum along to I am a little Teapot right now, even though the nursery rhyme is somewhat catchy but irrelevant. You might be short – somewhat 5’6 – but don’t let that stop you from wearing what you deem is necessary for your style. 

The Short and Stout Type

Are you busy looking for an umbrella to hide that magnificent pot belly even when it’s 80 degrees in the shade? Spare us the exaggeration and embrace the weight on your shoulders and on your tummy – literally. You’re portly, round and slightly hefty – and this isn’t helping you get anywhere in the fashion department. You pants don’t fit – they’re either a size too loose or perhaps too baggy – your shirts are perhaps too big and can’t be tucked inside your slacks.

So, what do you do?

Similar to all advices we’ve given so far, it’s time to embrace the Old’ McDonald style, and wear something that is best for your body shape and size.

Avoid baggy clothing

Before you channel yourself into a DJ rap artist in his mid-50s, try not to become too overwhelmed with baggy clothing. Baggy clothing will only draw attention to your stout size. Go for skinny fits and clothing that doesn’t adhere to a lot of fabric lying loose. 

Make sure your shirts and jackets are tailored to hug your shoulders, neck and chest properly. While you can alter the mid-section, taking the area in from the shoulders is somewhat impossible and therefore, might ruin the entire look of your jacket. 

Wear mid-rise and slim-straight pants

It’s better to get a tailored fit since most pants will not be able to fill in your hips, making alterations near to impossible. Do the same with shorts and see if they have a firm grip. 

Wear solid colors such as monochrome and small-scaled textures instead of bold prints.

The Short and Thin Type

Short and thin types deal with more misconceptions than insecurities. They always have to decide whether they should wear stripes or not and if investing in a good pair of elevator shoes will take their insecurities away or just add to them. The short and thin type is perhaps more insecure than any of the other three we’ve mentioned above – there are a lot of choices and slight malfunctions in their wardrobe can make them appear shorter than they really are.

So, what do you (or they) do?

Well, since there are more options at clothing stores for you, make sure you choose the right ones and style them gracefully to avoid looking too short.

Tapered pants with shorter cuffs

Sure, cuffing pants appear great, but have you seen Elijah Wood with the same look? Cuff you pants – but not too much – in order to avoid appearing stunted. Also, skinny pants are a no-no. Wear pants that slightly taper from below the knee so that your legs have room to breathe, and pull of the sleek and slender look at the same time.

Elevator shoes

Most short men tend to wear elevator shoes because it helps them appear taller while others feel more insecure. If it’s the heels that make you look more conspicuous, it’s time to leave that behind and embrace elevator shoes as they are. 

Stripes or no stripes?

Well, people are still wondering whether they should go with vertical stripes or horizontal stripes if they’re short. It was never about their direction in the first place. Before we make the One Direction pun, we want you to pay attention to the size of the stripes instead of focusing on their thickness and magnitude. Think small – thin stripes, little dots and small-scale checkers allow your height to become more inclusive.

Matching colors from head to toe

The fact that shorter men should only stick to wearing lighter colors is nothing short of a myth – pun intended. This is an important styling tip – if you’re considering wearing lighter colors, then go for similar colour patterns from head to toe. 

Short men look sturdy in darker colors too. So, slash the myth and pair your khakis with a white shirt or a pair of dark blue denim jeans with a dark brown or black leather jacket. 

Even if you’re going for a double-breasted suit, an immaculate fitting is necessary so that your shoulders don’t droop and you don’t look as if you’re all bones and no meat. 

Do you know the difference between you – a typical fashion disaster – and the teenager who lives next door? The teenager next door has roughly three graphic t-shirts of his favourite rock bands, a couple of white-washed jeans and a varsity jacket that is almost necessary for him to survive at school. With a lopsided hair-cut and the clichéd company of a guitar, this teenager is ready to face the wrath of his high school – with pride. 

You, on the other hand, despite all the fashion insecurities, know better how to channel your inner misconceptions and outer fashion malfunctions with just a little bit of effort. So, channel that inner confidence and wear your outfits in style, irrespective of your body weight and type.

5. Expand your comfort zone

Comfort zones are those situations and behavioral patterns where we feel safe and at ease. Things outside of this zone may cause us to experience anxiety. Work on expanding your comfort zone by trying new things and meeting new people. Do you avoid having drinks after work because small talk stresses you out?

Practice. There is no other way to overcome your anxiety! Take small steps. baby steps even! For example, practice developing your conversational ability with your colleagues during coffee breaks or at lunch. Be interesting and ask how they are doing or, what their plans are for the weekend.

Challenge yourself every day by doing things that cause you fear and trepidation. Smile and talk to strangers and see what happens. Did they smile back? Great! They didn’t? It’s not end of the world, right? Remember that social interactions should not be threatening or cause fear. You can get inspired by various hustle quotes to motivate yourself towards the new challenges.

6. Be independent

If you have high self-worth and consider yourself valuable, you will feel more confident. Accomplishing your tasks will not only be appreciated by your boss, but by the whole team as well. Nothing can boost your self-esteem better than recognition and praise for a job well done.

Make sure you do a great job and don’t be afraid to take credit when it is due. If there is a brainstorming session or job meeting, clearly and concisely state your ideas. If somebody criticizes your ideas, consider it as an opportunity to grow and learn. Constructive criticism can be helpful but don’t be afraid to stand up for your ideas if you feel confident in them. People appreciate colleagues that have the guts to stand up for themselves.

Always have some savings. Being financially stable makes you more confident at work and less sensitive to overthinking what other people think about you.

A huge confidence booster is to simply become better in whatever you are doing. Be confident that what you do and how you do is correct is easier when you can achieve your own goals. It’s maybe one of the most difficult points, but when accomplish makes our life flourish.

7. Achieve Your Goals

Many successful people credit their achievements to following a daily routine. Howard Schultz cycles with his wife each morning at 5.30 am. Richard Branson always has muesli and fruit salad for breakfast. Oprah Winfrey makes sure she sits in silence for 20 minutes twice a day.

A daily routine can help you not only get things done but take control of your life and its direction. But doesn’t routinely take away excitement and spontaneity?

Going to bed whenever you want, sleeping in until lunchtime, then playing video games until you can’t keep your eyes open anymore might sound like a life of freedom; but the reality is that it’s the furthest from free you can be. Follow this pattern for a while and you will become aimless, and less likely to do good work.

The Power of a Daily Routine

If you’re a highly ambitious person, this way of living is going to get really old, really fast. And the same goes for those of us who want to lose weight or get fit at the gym. If you’re hoping motivation is going to get you out of bed every morning, think again – it’s a routine that’s going to get you out the door and onto that exercise bike.

According to Dr Joann Lukins, Director of Peak Performance Psychology and Associate Professor at James Cook University “40% of our daily behaviors are routine. We are typically creatures of habit.” It seems any behaviour we repeat can turn into a habit, including good habits!

What a daily routine does is add structure to your life. It doesn’t take away your freedom or excitement; it simply allows you to do all the things you say you want to achieve. It’s about incorporating self-discipline into your life to become the person you want to be.

Top 3 benefits of a daily routine

  • Structure

A structured day means you know what you have to get done. You can have a flexible structure if that works best for you, but it’s important to get up at the same time every day to get your body into a rhythm. After a while, this rhythm becomes a habit and getting up becomes less of a struggle. The structure can also help prioritise important tasks as well as allow time for much needed breaks.

  • Self-discipline

The only reason you got up every morning to go to school was because your parents said you had to, because that’s what all kids do. When you become an adult, no one’s telling you what to do and when to do it. Many of us struggle with procrastination and doing everything we need to in a day. Self-discipline is a key component of a daily routine, it means doing things even when you don’t want to.

Perhaps you don’t feel like doing a load of laundry, or getting up at 5am for a gym session. Successful people don’t rely on what they want to do, but rather what they have to do. Self-discipline is about a long term commitment to your goals, not instant gratification.

  • Habit formation

When something becomes a habit, it becomes almost like second nature. It’s not something you have to think about, it simply falls into the routine of how you do things. We all have habits we want to kick, and that’s no easy task.

“The challenge”, says Dr Lukins, “is for us to regularly reflect on what our habits are and whether they are going to get us what we want.” Forming a good habit can be just as challenging, and it will definitely take a while to develop. Research suggests it can take anywhere from 2-8 months depending on how tough the habit is to incorporate into your life.

Three lists to get you started to focus on your goals

Anyone who is organised will tell you lists are a great way to visualise your tasks and goals. There are three lists that will help you stay focused and aid your routine; the task list, wish list and the goals list.

  • Task list

This is a list of all the tasks you have to do from today onwards. Every night before you go to bed, make sure you have a sufficient list of tasks prepared for the next day. It’s much easier to get out of bed in the morning when you have a full day of work to do. Your task list can include things like “finish introduction on project XYZ”, “complete a one-hour gym session” or “write 500 words for media assignment”.

  • Wish list

If you are someone who needs rewards to get motivated to complete tasks, a wish list might not be a bad idea. A daily routine shouldn’t be a chore, it should make you feel good about yourself. It also helps you stay on track, by having something to look forward to after completing tasks.

  • Goals list

In this list you want to write your goals for the future, for example “to have three more clients by the end of the year” or “complete the beginner level Spanish class”. Once you have achieved those goals you can cross them off the list. If your goals are fitness related, make sure they’re specific enough so that you can identify when you have achieved them. You should refer to your goals list from time to time to ensure your tasks are helping you reach those goals.

If you’re embarking on a business venture, goals are of even greater significance. According to Open Colleges’ trainer and assessor Danny Crouch, one of the most common mistakes new business owners make is failing to set goals both in the short and long term.

How to keep your daily routine

So you’re now well aware of the benefits of a daily routine and you have made your lists to get you off the ground running; what’s next?

  • Seize the day

If you start your day early, you’re more likely to get things done quicker and of course, you also have more time to do them. One study has suggested that late risers are more likely to be procrastinators. There are plenty of night owls out there who swear by a nighttime routine, so it’s up to you to find out how you work best.

  • Don’t neglect your health

Being healthy means getting enough nutrition and exercise to function at your best. It’s very easy to fall behind in your routine if you simply don’t have the energy to get through the day.

You don’t have to train at the gym every day if that’s not your thing, but make sure you put in some time to stay active and don’t use the excuse that you’re “too busy to eat lunch”! You’ll get more done in a day if you fuel your body with the energy it needs.

  • Prioritize productivity

Find a way to measure your productivity. If you rely on word count goals stick to them every day. If you have a number of assignments due in one week, prioritise them and create a realistic schedule to complete them within the timeframe. If you work from home, consider productivity apps to motivate you to stay on track with your daily tasks.

  • Befriend your calendar 

Time is not your enemy. Time is not something you kill. Time is the most precious gift of life, so use it wisely and learn to enjoy it. There are a few tools to keep your time more under control.

Whether you use a good old-fashioned pen and paper or your phone calendar, it’s really important to know where to dedicate your time. A calendar helps you stay on top of deadlines and plan for the week ahead. It is one of the best ways to stay organized. Allocate items on your task list to your calendar first, and then follow through by adding items from your wish and goal lists.

Decide whether you want to reward yourself once a month for goals achieved, or bigger rewards every three months to keep you motivated and working hard throughout the year. When you can visualize your months in advance, a routine starts to become much less daunting.

  • Clean up and declutter

How many times have you felt overwhelmed by the amount of junk in your room? Or maybe you have so many files on your desktop that you often can’t find what you’re looking for.

It’s a proven fact that clutter can mess with our minds and mood. Our external environment has a great influence on our stress and productivity levels. Take some time to tidy up your work area and you’ll see what a difference it makes to your overall output. A clean space is also a huge motivating factor because it improves your physical environment.

  • Improve your self-discipline

Creating a routine may very well be the easy part. Sticking to it however, is the true test of your self-discipline. The important thing is consistency, don’t give up but don’t beat yourself up either. If you struggle to keep it up on your own, consider approaching a mentor or life coach.

Their professional expertise means they can guide you personally through these steps. Remember, self-discipline isn’t going to come easy until you make it part of your daily thought process. Dr Lukins suggests starting small and reminding yourself why you want to do the behaviour, rather than what you have to do, she also stresses the importance of self-monitoring – visualising your progress is a great motivator.

How To Use Writing As A Self-Confidence Gaining Technique

In this modern age, it seems like we really don’t need to develop our writing skills. We especially don’t need to write with a pen and paper any more, as technology has basically eradicated the need. Or has it?

Although we may not need to be able to write large texts after leaving education, and we don’t need to find a pen in order to communicate with our friends, there’s a lot to be said for taking up the older forms of writing.

One of the best reasons to improve your writing skills is because when you work on certain writing projects, it helps you work on your confidence.

Writing helps focus your mind on what you need in your life, and lets you work towards those goals every day. Here are some techniques to try, so you can improve your confidence and get ahead in both work and your home life.

1. Write down daily checklists, on paper

You’re probably used to writing to do lists, either in an app on your phone, or a program on your PC or laptop. You probably also ignore it whenever possible, as you find yourself doing unimportant tasks to ignore the important stuff that’s sitting on that list. They’re ok for getting things done, but there’s nothing quite like a handwritten to do list that you can physically cross off when you get things done.

Buy a notebook, and every day, sit and write down what needs to be done. Because you physically have to write it down, you’ll find that you’re thinking about what you need to do. This way, you’ll feel like you’ll be able to say no to unessential tasks, and save time for the things you really need to do.

2. Commit your goals and ideas to paper

In a related point, try using that notebook, or another, specially chosen notebook, to write down all of your goals. A good way of doing this is at the beginning of the year, as you start a new diary you can write them in at the beginning.

A lack of confidence can come from a lack of ideas about what you want from life, and ideas about how to go about it. Actually taking the time to think about your goals means that you’ll then go about your day with them in the back of your mind, and so everything you do will get you a little bit closer to them.

3. Stretch your imagination with fiction writing

Every morning, first thing, try writing some fiction to get your imaginative juices flowing. You can do this either by hand, or in a word processing program if you feel you’ll work better that way. You may have never written fiction before, but it is well worth trying.

Having to think creatively about your story means that you’re stretching your creative muscles, and so you’ll be better at thinking around problems that you’ll encounter in your everyday life. If you’re stuck for ideas on how to get started, think about your favourite genre of books or movies. What are your favourite stories from that genre? Work out what you liked the most about them, and use those plot points to build a brand new story.

4. Write in a diary

Now thinking about the end of your day, try writing in a diary or journal before you go to bed. It does seem as though diaries are something only children keep, but they do have a lot of benefits.

If you have a habit of worrying over the events of the day as you’re trying to sleep, writing them all down before bed means you’re dealing with those worries productively. You’ll then have the confidence the next day to confront any problems you come across, and you’ll find that you have less to worry about at night.

5. Send postcards to those you love

Postcards are fun when you’re on holiday, as they show off where you’ve gone on your travels and let your loved ones know you’re thinking of them. Why not try sending them when you’re at home? It may feel a little strange to be sending postcards from your home town, but there’s a good reason for it.

Gaining confidence means gaining ability in expressing yourself, and postcards are a safe place to start. As an added bonus, you’ll be helping improve your relationships, and even possibly making new ones. Nothing is better for boosting your ego than making new connections, and having more people by your side when you need them.

6. Try your hand at jokes

Ever thought about becoming a comedian? The thought of standing on stage and telling jokes may fill you with utter terror, but that’s not what you need to do in order to try building your confidence. Writing jokes and funny stories means you’re thinking in different ways that you’re not used to, making you more comfortable with unusual situations. Plus, stretching your funny bone means you’ll have a great stash of stories you can pull out of the bag the next time you’re at a party, or need to impress someone at work.

Now, you have eight tips under your belt that can help you improve your confidence, and, as a bonus, your writing skills. Try them all out. Maybe not all of them will work for you, but that’s ok. Pick out the ones that are helping you, and stick to them. Building these habits means that every day, you’re building up your confidence bit by bit. Before long, you’ll notice just how much of a difference it’s making in your everyday life.


About the author Patrick Banks

Patrick is a Berlin-based dating advisor, motivational speaker, a huge fitness and vegan diet enthusiast and the main editor at Wingman Magazine, specialised in men's health. His ultimate goal is to share with men around the world his passion for self-development and to help them to become the greatest version of themselves. He believes a healthy body and successful social interactions are two main keys to happiness.

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