How to Be a Gentleman: Be The Man Of Her Dreams With New Age Chivalry


Not all superheroes wear capes, some are plain chivalrous.

We live in an era, where dating is defined by words like “Netflix and Chill” and “Swiping Right/Left”. In the quest of searching a potential partner, people are more into hookups and less into ‘meaningful relationships’.

This entire scenario leads us to believe that the art of chivalry is long dead. With no scope of revival whatsoever. Looking at chivalry from the behavioural psychology point of view, it was more of a duty performed by men to protect women. The idea stemmed from the fact that women were thought of as the weaker gender. Also, men’s duty was broken down into ‘courtly love’ and being gentle to a lady. Men were brought up with these standards irrespective of their social status.

But then, even in the age where technology has taken over our emotions, a little bit of old-fashioned chivalry still exists in bits and pieces as seen in several instances.

And there also exists a code of chivalry, which men need to take into consideration when it comes to wooing their lady love. In no particular order, the code includes the following pointers:

                                                   Truth                              Loyalty

                                                    Largesse                      Courtesy

                                                    Noblesse                      Valor

                                                    Humility                        Honor

                                                    Justice                          Prowess

Having said that, what are the exact protocols that will make you a chivalrous man for your girl? How exactly are you going to make her feel special without being over the top? What will make you her knight in shining armour?

Find the answers in the following tips:

1. Share your jacket/umbrella

Come rain come snow, if the weather gets cold, the first rule of chivalry is to offer your lady the jacket you are wearing or hold the umbrella to shield her from rains. If nothing is available, then speed up and get the car or a taxi and get her home safely. It shows that you are humble and valiant.

Come rain come snow, if the weather gets cold, the first rule of chivalry is to offer your lady the jacket you are wearing or hold the umbrella to shield her from rains. If nothing is available, then speed up and get the car or a taxi and get her home safely. It shows that you are humble and valiant.

2. Choose to walk close to the street

One of the lesser known chivalrous practices is to stay close to the pavement and protect women from perils like – being splashed by puddles of water when cars pass by or the traffic at peak hours. Trust me, this looks very gentlemanly on your part and she’ll notice this little gesture and remember it forever.

3. Pick her up from her home

Going out on a date? Offer to pick her from her doorstep and drive her to the venue of the date. This is chivalry at its best. It also establishes a connection between you two, especially if it happens to be your first date. Bonus points if you arrive at the exact time and wait for her to come!

4. Drop her back home

In addition to picking up your lady from her home, it is your responsibility to drop her back safely to her home as well. One of the best options is to park your car or taxi at a distance and walk her up to the door. If it is not possible for you to drop her home, ensure that she reaches home safely by accompanying her up to a point or giving the instructions to a cab driver and paying in advance to drop her home.

If it is you, who’s driving her home, then get out of your car, open the door for her and see her off. This will make her feel warm and loved and indicate the you did spend a good time together.

5. Introduce her to your friends and family

If you are out on a date and happen to bump into a friend, relative or an acquaintance on the way, make it a point to introduce her to them. All the same, you can specially take her home and introduce her to your family or friends over breakfast, lunch, dinner or any occasion. This will make her feel valued and important.

6. Meet her parents

Whether you are going steady with a girl or not, meet her parents, say, while picking her up or dropping her home. Or any other time. Spending time together with her family members will make them trust you more and the girl will see you as a keeper.

7. Call her more often

Texting has taken over the world of communication by fire. Although it is a good practice to send mushy texts day and night to remind that you truly love and care for her, occasionally picking up the phone and calling her up will win her heart for sure!

8. Write to her

Writing letters is long dead. Texting and emails have taken over the world. Snapchat stories and instant messengers rule the roost, leaving no scope for handwritten notes on a piece of paper. But then, writing letters give a very personal touch to the message and tells the girl that you really like her and can go out of the way to impress her and win her affection.

9. Remember the D-days

Be it her birthday or your first monthly anniversary, make it a point to remember all the important dates that matter to her. Guys are usually bad at remembering dates but then, you must make a conscious effort to remember the D-days and apart from remembering the important dates, celebrate it with a gift, flowers or a movie-date. Even a long-stemmed rose with a card to accompany it, will brighten up her day.

10. Compliment her

This may not exactly be a rule of the thumb for being chivalrous, but complimenting your girl such as telling her that she’s looking gorgeous at every single opportunity, will make her admire you more.

Compliments can be tricky… When you overdo it, she will stop trusting your words at all. Read more here about how to compliment a girl.

11. Be gentle and kind to all

Chivalry may be about protecting women’s interests and all that. But it is also how much of a gentleman you are. And to prove this fact in the true sense, you need to be gentle and kind to all, especially the underprivileged and the less fortunate, the elderly and young kids. Showing empathy towards them and being a benevolent soul in general, establishes the fact that you have a kind and humane side to you. This will work in your favor in winning her over.

As women fight for equal opportunities and stand up for their rights, they don’t mind being a little pampered or getting a little attention from the opposite gender. Sometimes, it is good to go ‘old school’ and walk down the path with chivalrous men, whose gestures will surely melt them

About the author Ann Neal

Ann Neal is a passionate blogger who frequently writes about tips related to living and lifestyle. She is a travel enthusiast and is also associated with idealo.